1.
A schoolboy went home with a pain in his stomach. Well, sit down and eat your tea, said his mother. Your stomach's hurting because it's empty. It'll be all right when you've got something in it.
Shortly afterwards Dad come in from the office, complaining of a headache.
That's because it's empty, said his bright son. You'd be all right if you had something in it.
一個男孩放學回家時，覺得肚子痛。來，坐下，吃點點心，媽媽說，你肚子痛是因爲肚子是空的。吃點東西就會好的。
一會兒，男孩的爸爸下班回家了，說是頭痛。
你頭痛是因爲你的腦袋是空的，他那聰明的兒子說，裏面裝點東西，就會好的。
2.
I've Just Bitten My Tongue
"Are we poisonous?" the young snake asked his mother.
"Yes, dear," she replied - "Why do you ask?"
"Cause I've just bitten my tongue! "
Notes:
(1) poisonous adj.有毒的
(2) Cause I've just bitten my tongue 因爲我剛咬了自己的舌頭。 句中 Cause 是 Because 的縮略形式。
我剛咬破自己的`舌頭
“我們有毒嗎?”一個年幼的蛇問它的母親。
“因爲我剛剛咬破自己的舌頭。”
3.
How much English can you speak?
"Your Honor, I want to bring to your attention how unfair it is for my client to
be accused of theft. He arrived in New York City a week ago and barely knew his
way around. What's more, he only speaks a few words of English."
The judge looked at the defendant and asked, "How much English can you speak?"
The defendant looked up and said, "Give me your wallet!"
"法官先生，我的當事人被指控偷竊，這是多麼不公正啊。他一週前纔來到紐約，幾乎不認路。
而且，他只會說幾個英語單詞。"
法官看了看被告，問道："你會說多少英文?"
被告擡起頭，說："把你的錢包給我!"