笑話大多揭示生活中乖謬的現象，具有諷刺性和娛樂性。其趣味有高下之分。小編你挑選了好笑的`英語笑話集錦，希望你會喜歡，一起來歡樂笑笑啊!
好笑的英語笑話篇一：I didn't know that I was so far
A big battle was going on during the First World War. Guns were firing, and shells andbullets were flying about everywhere. After an hour of this, one of the soldiers decidedthat the fighting was getting too dangerous for him, so he left the front line and began to go away from the battle. After he had walked for an hour, he saw an officer coming towards him. The officer stopped him and said, “ where are you going?”
“I'm trying to get as far away as possible from the battle that's going on behind us, sir,” the soldier answered.
“Do you know who I am?” the officer said to him angrily. “I'm your commanding officer.”
The soldier was very surprised when he heard this and said, “My God, I didn't know that I was so far back already!”
我想不到已經往回跑了這麼遠
第一次世界大戰期間，一場大戰役正在進行。槍炮轟鳴，炮彈和子彈到處亂飛。這樣過了一個小時後，一個士兵認定戰鬥對他來說變得太危險了，所以他離開前線開始逃離戰場。步行了一個小時之後，他看見一個軍官向他走過來。那軍官叫住他說：“你要到哪兒去?”
“長官，我正儘可能遠地躲開我們身後正在進行的戰役，”士兵回答說。
“你知道我是誰嗎?”軍官生氣地對他說：“我是你的指揮官。”
那士兵聽到此話感到非常驚訝，說：“天哪，我想不到我已經往回跑了這麼遠了!”
好笑的英語笑話篇二：Why Is He Howling
Dentist: Please stop howling. I haven't even touched your tooth yet.
Patient: I know, but you are standing on my foot!
他爲什麼喊
牙醫：請你不要再喊了!我還沒碰你的牙呢。
病人：我知道，可是你正踩着我的腳呀!
好笑的英語笑話篇三：紳士
A gentleman was sitting quietly in a first-class compartment. Two ladies got in. One of them saw that the window was open and she shut it before sitting down."Open it again," said the second lady, "I'll die of suffocation(窒息，悶死) if there is no fresh air.""I won't open it," said the first lady, "I'll die of cold if the window is open."A querrel started, and it continued until the gentleman spoke:"Let's have the window shut until this lady has died of suffocation, and then we can have it open until this lady has died of cold. After that it will be nice and quiet in here again."
解決問題的好辦法 一位紳士正靜靜地坐在頭等包廂裏，有兩位女士走了進來。其中一位見窗戶開着，就在落坐之前把窗戶“把窗戶打開，”第二位女士說道，“如果沒有新鮮空氣，我會被憋死的。” “不能打開，”第一位說道，“如果它開着，我會被凍死的。” 一場爭吵開始，沒完沒了，直到那位紳士開口： “我們先讓窗戶關着，直到把這位女士憋死，然後再打開窗戶，直到把這位女士凍死。那以後，這兒就可以恢復平靜了。”
好笑的英語笑話篇四：Doctor and Patient 醫生和病人
Doctor: How many ears and eyes does a cat have?
Patient: Two of each.
Doctor: And how many legs does it have?
Patient: Say, Doctor, haven't you ever seen a cat?
醫生：一隻貓有幾個耳朵和眼睛?
病人：都是兩個。
醫生：那麼它有幾條腿呢?
病人：我說，醫生，難道你從來沒有見過貓嗎?