看一些英語笑話，既能學習英語知識，也能開心，今天我們就一起來看看英語笑話搞笑集錦吧!
英語笑話搞笑集錦(一)
A pair of honeymooners checked into the Watergate Hotel in Washington, D. C. That night, as the husband was about to turn off the light, his bride asked, "Do you think this room is bugged?"
"That was a long time ago, sweet-heart," he reassured her.
"But what if there's a microphone somewhere? I'd be so embarrassed."
So the groom searched under the tables and behind the pictures. Then he turned back the rug. Sure enoush, there was a funny-looking gizmo in the floor. He took out the screws, got rid of the hardware, and climbed into bed.
The next morning the newly weds were awakened by a hotel clerk who wanted to know if they had slept well. "We did," replied the groom. "Why do you ask?"
"It's rather unusual." The clerk answered, "Last night the couple in the room below yours had a chandelier fall on them."
有一對正在華盛頓度蜜月的新婚夫婦， 他們來到水門旅館登記住宿。到了晚上，丈夫剛要熄燈，新娘子問道：“你覺得房間裏會不會裝有竊聽器?”
“親愛的'，那都是多少年前的事了。”丈夫勸她打消這種念頭。
“然而假如真的藏着傳聲器，那該怎麼辦呢?叫人多難堪啊!”
因此，新郎搜查了一圈，從桌子底下和掛畫後面的牆壁。最後，他翻開了地毯。不出所料，地板上有個外表奇特的小東西。他擰下螺絲，拆掉零件，之後就上牀睡覺了。
第二天早上，這對新人被旅館的工作人員的敲門聲驚醒。工作人員問他們晚上睡得怎麼樣。 “很好啊，”新郎回答到，“爲什麼你要問這個問題呢?”
“這太奇怪了，”工作 人員說道，“昨天夜裏，你們樓下那對夫婦被枝型吊燈砸了。”
英語笑話搞笑集錦(二)
The patient is adamant. "Doc, I need a liver transplant, a kidney transplant, a heart transplant, a cornea transplant, a spleen transplant, a pancreas trans. . ." "What makes you think you need all these?" Well, replied the patient, "My boss said if I wanted to keep my job I needed to get reorganized."
這個病人顯得很堅決。“醫生，我需要做肝臟移植、腎臟移植、心臟移植、角膜移植、脾臟移植、胰腺移植和……” “你爲什麼認爲你需要做這麼多移植手術?”病人回答：“哦，是這樣，我的老闆說如果我這個人不重新組裝的話，就別想保住我的工作!”
英語笑話搞笑集錦(三)
Dentist: I'm sorry, madam, but I'll have to charge you twenty-five dollars for pulling your son's tooth.
Mother: Twenty-five dollars! But I thought you only charged five dollars for an extraction.
Dentist: I usually do. But your son yelled so loud, he scared four other patients out of the office.
牙科醫生：對不起，夫人，爲給您的兒子拔牙，我得收二十五美元。
母親：二十五美元!可是我知道您拔一顆牙只要五美元呀?
牙科醫生：是的。但是您兒子這麼大聲地叫喚，他都嚇跑四位病人了