I Hope So 我希望如此
Neighbor: Do you think your son will forget all he learned at college?
Father: I hope so. He certainly can't make a living by kissing girls!
鄰居：您認爲您的兒子會把在大學裏學的東西全忘光嗎?
父親：我希望這樣--他當然不能以吻女孩子謀生吧!
What do I get? 我能得到什麼?
Teacher: If I cut a beefsteak in half and then cut the half in half, what do I get?
老師：如果我把一塊牛排切成兩半的兩半，我能得到幾塊兒?
Tommy: Quarters.
湯米：四塊。
Teacher: And then if I cut it twice again?
老師：那我要是再切兩次，我能得到什麼呢?
Tommy: Hamburger.
湯米：漢堡。
Good news or Bad news?
An artist was part of an exhibition, and he asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings that were currently on display.
"I've got good news and bad news," the owner replied.
"Give me the good news first," the artist demanded.
"The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it wouldappreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all 15 of your paintings."
"That's wonderful!" the artist exclaimed, "What could the bad news possibly be?"
With concern, the gallery owner replied, "The gentleman in question was your doctor."
以爲藝術家在一個畫廊辦了個展覽，他問店主是否有人對他參展的畫感興趣。
“我有一個好消息和一個壞消息。”店主回答。
“先告訴我好消息。”畫家要求道。
“好消息是一位紳士詢問了你的作品，還問它是否會在你死後增。我告訴他會的，然後他買下了你所有的'15幅畫作。”
“那太棒了!”畫家驚歎。“那麼什麼會是壞消息呢?”
店主想了想之後說：“問那個問題的是你的醫生”。