The Bad News and the Terrible News Michael sat in his attorney's office. "Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?" the lawyer asked. "Give me the bad news first." "Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars." "That's the bad news?" asked Michael incredulously. "I can't wait to hear the terrible news." "The terrible news is that it's of you and your secretary."
幽默笑話英語二：
The Day that You're Inaugurated A woman and her husband were out shopping when she realized that she needed to purchase some hair color for her graying hair. "When are you going to stop buying that expensive stuff," complained the husband, "and let your hair go gray like Barbara Bush?" "The day that you're inaugurated," the wife replied.
幽默笑話英語三：
I'll Go There Myself There was once a landlord who always pretended he was knowledgeable though he was completely unable to read or write. One day when the landlord was chatting with his guests, a servant came in and gave him a letter which asked him to lend a cow. The landlord was afraid that his guests would know he was unable to read or write, so he opened the envelope and glanced over the words. Then he said to the servant, "OK, please tell him I'll go there myself in a few minutes."