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每日精品英語笑話

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1、A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came in telling them to disperse some people who were loitering. The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner.

每日精品英語笑話

The rookie rolled down his window and said, "Let's get off the corner, people." A few glances, but no one moved, so he barked again, "Let's get off that !" Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled stares in his direction.

Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, "Well, how did I do?" "Pretty good," chuckled the veteran policemen, "especially since this is a bus stop!"

一名新警察與老警察開着警車第一次出去巡邏。 他們得到命令去疏散一羣閒逛的人,於是他們開車去了那條街,看到路口站着一羣人。

新警察搖下窗戶:“大家注意了,快離開這裏。”人們看了他幾眼,沒理他。他喊起來:“離開這裏,馬上離開!”大家都不知道怎麼回事,但是在他的威脅下還是離開了。

新警察對他第一次執行公務的結果很滿意,對老警察說:“我幹得怎麼樣?”“你做得很好,”老警察笑着說,“尤其是在公共汽車站。”


  2、A friend of mine was giving an English lesson to a class of adult who had recently come to live in the United States.

After placing quite a number of everyday objects on a table, he asked various members of the class to give him the ruler, the book, the pen and so on. The class went very smoothly and the students seemed interested and serious about the work that they were engaged in until when my friend turned to an Italian student and said, "Give me the kays."

The man looked surprised and somewhat at a loss. Seeing this, my friend thought that the student hadn't heard him clearly, so he repeated. "Give me the kays." The Italian shrugged his shoulders. Then, he threw his arms around the teacher's neck and kissed him on both cheeks.

我的一位朋友在給一個成人學生班級英語課。他們都是新近來美國生活的。

在一張桌子上擺了許多日常用品之後,他請全班同學給他挑出尺子,書本,鋼筆等。課進行得井然有序,學生們對自己所做的似乎很感興趣,也很認真。後來輪到一名來自意大利的學生,我的朋友說:“給我鑰匙。”

那人看起來非常吃驚,也有點手足無措。看到這種情況,我的'朋友想是他沒有聽清楚,於是又重複了一遍:“給我鑰匙。”那位意大利學生聳了聳肩。接着,他伸出胳膊摟住老師的脖子在雙頰上親了兩下。


  3、An old lady who was very deaf and who thought everything too dear, went into a shop and asked the shopman:' How much this stuff?'

'Seven dollars, Madam, it is very cheap.'

The lady said, 'It is too much, give it to me for fourteen.'

'I did not say seventeen dollars, but seven.'

'It is still too much,' replied the old lady, 'give it to me for five.'

一位耳聾並且總是嫌東西太貴的老太太走進一家商店。 她問店員:“這東西要多少錢?”

“七美元,太太,這是很便宜的。”

老太太說:“太貴了,十四美元差不多。”

店員忙說:“我沒說十七美元,是七美元。”

“還是太貴,”老太太說:“五美元,我就買啦。”