Two Pieces of Cake
Tom: Mom, can I have two pieces of cake, please?
Mom: Certainly -- take this piece and cut it two!
兩塊蛋糕
湯姆：媽媽，我可以吃兩塊蛋糕嗎?
媽媽：當然可以----拿這塊蛋糕把它切成兩塊吧!
After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date.
和相親對象呆了一晚上後，男人再也受不了了。
Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave.
他事先安排了個朋友給他打電話，這樣他就能借故先離開了。
When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died."
當他回到桌邊，他垂下眼睛，裝出一副陰沉的'表情，說：“有個不幸的消息，我的祖父剛剛去世了。”
"Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"