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短篇爆笑英語笑話大全

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短篇爆笑英語笑話大全

  短篇爆笑英語笑話一

She Ate All My Bait 她把所有的`誘餌都吃了

The young boy protested vigorously when his mother asked him to take his little sister along fishing. "The last time she came," he objected, "I didn't catch a single fish."

"I'll talk to her," his mother said, "and I promise this time she won't make any noise."

"It wasn't the noise, Mom," the boy replied, "She ate all my bait."

當媽媽提出讓小男孩帶着妹妹一起去釣魚時,他堅決反對。“上次她跟着我,”他反對説,“我連一條魚都沒能釣上。”

“我會告訴她,”媽媽説,“我保證這次她不再發出響聲了。”

“媽媽,不是響聲,”男孩回答,“是她把所有的誘餌都吃了。”

  短篇爆笑英語笑話二

Only One Instance 傻瓜來信

Mr. Henry Beecher entered Plymouth Church one Sunday and found several letters awaiting him.

He opened one and found it contained the single word ″Fool″.

Quietly and with becoming seriousness he announced to the congregation the fact in these words:

″I have known many an instance of a man writing a letter and forgetting to sign his name,

but this is the only instance I have ever known of a man signing his name and forgetting to write the letter.″

一個星期天,亨利·比切先生到普利茅斯的教堂去,在那裏有他的幾封信。

他打開其中一封,發現信中只寫着“傻瓜”兩個字。

他平靜而認真地把這件事告訴教友們:

“寫信時忘了簽名的人,我遇到過很多,但只簽名卻忘了寫信的人,我還是頭一次遇到。”

  短篇爆笑英語笑話三

Perfect Match 絕配

A wealthy matron is so proud of a valuable antique vase that she decides to have her bedroom painted the same color as the vase. Several painters try to match the shade, but none comes close enough to satisfy the eccentric woman.

Eventually, a painter approaches who is confident he can mix the proper color. The woman is pleased with the result, and the painter becomes famous.

Years later, he retires and turns the business over to his son. ″Dad,″ says the son, ″there's something I've got to know. How did you get those walls to match the vase so perfectly?″

″Son,″ the father replies, ″I painted the vase.″

一位富婆為擁有一隻珍貴的古玩花瓶而深感驕傲,以至於竟要把卧室漆成與花瓶同樣的顏色。幾名油漆匠試圖調出這個底色,但是誰也不能令那位古怪的婦女滿意。

最後來了位油漆匠。他非常自信能調出那種顏色。那位富婆對他的成果非常滿意,油漆匠於是一舉成名。

多年以後,他退休了,生意也交給了兒子。

“爸爸,”兒子説,“有件事我得弄清楚,您是怎樣使牆的顏色與花瓶配得那麼完美的?”

“兒子,”父親回答説,“我漆了花瓶。”